In Chapter 6 of Emotionally Engaged: A Bride's Guide to Surviving the "Happiest" Time of Her Life I discuss the chill that can descend on warm friendships after your engagement.
While your relationships with married friends may go unaffected, often it is the single friends that distance themselves.
They begin to feel replaced by your fiancé. Your Mr. Right scares them into thinking they may possibly never find theirs...
Below I have included a small portion of the chapter that tells Pauline’s story. A bride, who many times had been a bridesmaid, keenly aware of the sensitivity her friends needed.
Four friends, four different outcomes
“I’m so happy for you, Pauline,” Gina volunteered just fays after Pauline got engaged. "And I hope it’s okay to tell you this, but watching you find Mr. Right just makes me worry about myself, you know?”
With Gina, Pauline had it easy, because Gina was able to separate her own feelings into two categories: sad for herself, and happy for Pauline.
Gina didn’t shy away from her feelings of sadness; she didn’t push the sadness away because it was real for her.
And voicing her sadness – expressing and sharing it with Pauline—was essential because it made their interactions real and honest.
Both Gina, and Pauline knew where the other stood, how the other felt, and how the other valued the friendship.