My uncertainty compounded over a few months of rumination and eventually grew into dread and paralysis.
I thought that the feelings I was experiencing could ONLY mean that the marriage was not supposed to happen.
From "fetal position" to the happiest wedding day: One bride's very successful bridal counseling experience
Here's the very successful story of Erin, a 27-year-old bride-to-be, who I helped get married this summer.
Do you see yourself in her story?
Before meeting with Allison, I felt terrified, isolated, and confused.
I was so scared that what I was feeling wasn't "normal."
Scared that seeing Allison meant I had somehow failed at being a bride-to-be.
Scared that I was making the wrong decision in choosing to marry my fiancé.
"Eight months before my wedding, I completely freaked out."
"Whenever anyone mentioned the wedding or my fiancé, my throat tightened. I'd get short of breath. My heart raced. I was scared.
Four months earlier, I happily said "yes!" to a wonderful man who understood me inside and out and was perfect on paper.
Before getting engaged, I loved my relationship.
I loved him, felt lucky to be with him, and that we had such a special and magical relationship.
Now, I was no longer attracted to my fiance. I was questioning the whole relationship.
Educate yourself about what's normal -- but not talked about
Your engagement will be a wild ride, emotionally.
You will be exhausted, emotionally, early on. Be nice to yourself, take a step back, don’t think about the wedding for a while. Take a break, you will need it.
Read and re-read Allison’s book, Emotionally Engaged: A Bride's Guide to Surviving the "Happiest" Time of Your Life again and again and watch the Happy Bride's Secret Toolkit videos. Educate yourself on what's normal for brides-to-be to feel, but not talked about.
Let go of any expectations you may have. You won’t be able to anticipate what happens next.
When the ring isn't quite right, some brides are sent down a rabbit hole of anxiety:
Before I contacted Allison, I felt overwhelmed.
Unable to deal with the the complexities of both my changing situations and the emotions that went along with them.
My analytical brain was on overdrive, and I knew I wasn't in a good place. I knew I had found the woman I wanted to marry, but I was unsure of whether I could go through with it.
How could I be absolutely sure I was doing the right thing?
For months, they tried to talk themselves into these marriages
At that time, I was struggling with a lot of stress and anxiety about my place in life and my future. I was living in a city where I didn’t want to live, at a job that didn’t feel right, and with a man that I knew I loved... but I was struggling with a lot of big questions.
Did I love him enough to be married to him forever?