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Brides' Secret Obsessions
BRIDES HAVE SECRETS -- secret tiny details
that mean everything to them and nothing to anybody else.
One bride I know was obsessed with blue gingham ribbon. She tied everything
with it -- invitations, programs, nametags, favors, driving directions for
guests. With 300 wedding guests, she tied bows up to and even after walking
down the aisle!
Another bride loved place cards. During her
engagement, she loved going to paper and party stores to look at them. She'd
imagine what the tables would look like, how her friends' names would look on
each card.
Look at these secret
details metaphorically. What is the image, the metaphor, in the
detail? By exploring the image, you can figure out what each bride might be
working through, emotionally, by means of the detail.
Imagine the tying of bows as a metaphor: is the
bride is tying things up? Maybe the physical act of tying hundreds of bows gave
her a sense of control when other things felt out of control. Or, maybe it
means that she had some relational loose ends to tie up before she got married,
but instead of doing the work emotionally, she was trying to do it physically.
The hunt for placecards brought joy to that bride.
It could be that her interest in placecards helped her literalize her wedding --
helped make it more real. Or, possibly, the placecards were a way for her to
make order of imagining her loved ones coming to her wedding.
The detail that a bride chooses can tell her
something about what's going on, emotionally, for her that she may not have been
aware of.
What are your secret
details? What might you be trying to work out, emotionally, through
them? What new information about your emotional life do you glean from looking
at your secret detail metaphorically?
Why do all of this?
Because the more you understand you emotional experience, the more you'll be
able to feel all the joy and love of this amazing time of life.
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