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Book to Blog, Chapter 3:  The Last First Kiss -- Grieving the End of Your Single Life 

8/14/2014

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Grieving the End of Your Single Life, Emotionally Engaged Chapter 2
In chapter three I address the emotions that surface when facing the idea of the end of "single you." 

Though the time of being engaged can be an exciting whirlwind for brides, it also can feel... lonely. 

Lonely because you feel you may lose some degree of intimacy with your single girlfriends. 

Lonely because your identity is going from career-woman to wife. 

Lonely because you are trying to adjust to whole new YOU

Below I have included an excerpt from the chapter that dives into the concept of  moving out of your place, and into your fiancés (or vice-a-versa) and the emotions that may come along with now sharing one of the most personal things – a home.

Moving has never been a major trauma for Pauline

In fact, she was that rare bird who actually enjoyed the process of searching for the perfect apartment, packing up her belongings, and starting new. It had always been more of an adventure than a source of stress for Pauline.

Until she packed to move into her fiancés apartment

This move was unlike all the others. 

“I had a very keen awareness that I would be unpacking my boxes as a married person, and that alone was enough to send me off the deep end,” said Pauline.

For Pauline, the line between single life and married life was very distinct. 

She’d never lived with a guy before, so she was crossing over that line into marriage. 

“No longer would I be single,” she remembers thinking as she packed. “My life would be entwined with somebody else’s. 

"I could no longer make decisions that affected only me"

I was anticipating having somebody around all the time. 

It was a lot to get used to.” 

Click here to find out more of what Chapter 3 holds!

Please share your thoughts in the comments below, and stay tuned for next week’s installment of "Book to Blog" – Chapter 4!
Allison Moir-Smith
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Book to Blog, Chapter 1:  The Happiest Time of My Life? Yeah, Right.

7/31/2014

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Emotionally Engaged Book to Blog Chapter 1
In Chapter I of Emotionally Engaged: A Bride's Guide to Surviving the "Happiest" Time of Her Life, I disclose details on my relationship, engagement, and ultimately my wedding. 

By putting my personal story in the first couple of pages of the book, I was hoping to speak directly to the reader, and somehow say "I’ve been where you are." 

Below are a few snippets from the chapter that embody my message, my honesty, and my truth. 

More than two million brides

During my engagement,  I learned how to turn my conflicting emotions into important personal growth. I wanted to help other brides-to-be do the same. 

So a few months after our wedding, I founded Emotionally Engaged Counseling for Brides and focused my psychotherapy practice solely on brides-to-be. 

I took a chance, starting my practice for brides with this premise:

If I felt that discombobulated during my engagement, some of the 2.3 million American brides might too

Either that, or I was one in 2.3 million and a complete freak. 

Most brides attended my workshops hoping to learn how to eliminate their negative feelings

They were afraid to give in to their sadness and fear, thinking  that once they turned on the faucet, they’d never be able to shut it off. 

In reality, emotions work the opposite way. 

When strong emotions are not felt, they grow in power and intensity

When they are felt, the sadness and fear pass through your system. Facing and feeling negative emotions can have a cathartic effect. It cleans house of the fear and sadness, doubt and worry, and makes room once again for positive feelings of joy, excitement, and happiness.

Click here to find out more of what Chapter 1 holds

Please share your thoughts in the comments below, and stay tuned for next week’s installment of "Book to Blog: Chapter 2"!
Allison Moir-Smith
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The Power of Journaling for Brides

6/20/2014

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The Power of Journaling for Brides
Most brides contact me because they often feel overwhelmed by a complex mix of emotions.

They feel overrun at times by extreme happiness that they are marrying this great guy.

At the same time, they're also stressed, sad, anxious, fearful, and confused.  

Feeling this way can be disorienting and disturbing.

And definitely not what you expected to feel during your engagement.

Emotional overwhelm is a common state for some brides


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