Here's how one bride worked through her feelings of engagement anxiety
I can tell you how effective bridal counseling can be at dealing with cases of cold feet, engagement depression and engagement anxiety.
But it's far more effective to hear it straight from a bride.
This blog was written by Ashley, author also of Dear Newly Engaged Me: Here's a Laundry List of Things I Wish I'd Known From the Start. Read below about her journey from panicked to peaceful.
"Eight months before my wedding, I completely freaked out."
Four months earlier, I happily said "yes!" to a wonderful man who understood me inside and out and was perfect on paper.
Before getting engaged, I loved my relationship.
Now, I was no longer attracted to my fiance. I was questioning the whole relationship.
I was so confused.
I never imagined I'd have cold feet.
Negative feelings got hold of me so badly that I'd just look at my fiancé and cry.
I felt so guilty for having those feelings and even worse for knowing how those feelings would hurt him.
I felt as though I had lost my mind.
I searched the Internet, and of course felt even worse.
I scared myself in to a dark hole, an abyss of no return, reading late into the night.
The last blog I came across was this one. I was skeptical.
My first reaction was "Wow, another money-grubbing scam to trick brides into spending more money on this money pit of a wedding."
I was skeptical, and I was scared to talk to a therapist, since I had never talked to one before.
But I was at my wit's end, so I immediately downloaded her book.
I kid you not: I felt better instantly and was laughing out loud
The next day I continued to read her book and welled up with tears watching her videos online. Together, they kept me from being a weepy mess over the weekend.
Finally, someone understood what I was feeling.
To my surprise, Allison emailed me back that day. She was real; this wasn't a hoax.
We set up a consultation for the following week. (In the meantime, I had booked appointments with the best therapists in the area -- University of Pennsylvania-degree-toting therapists who seemed quite cold.)
During my free 15-minute video consultation, I just cried. I barely got words out.
I told her how I felt, and she could not have been more warm and compassionate. She even made this face, because she could really feel my exact pain. (For a while, I'd cry every time she did it.)
Because that's what I needed: I needed someone to know what I was feeling.
I reassured my fiance that I had found the help I needed, and that I would be fine.
She told me to take a month-long break from planning the wedding and to take it easy on myself.
She put me at such ease that I cancelled all appointments with the University of Pennsylvania therapists and put my faith in Allison.
I was still scared she'd tell me to call off the wedding...
She never did. She is not a Magic 8 ball or a fortune teller.
She is a therapist.
She gave me the tools I needed to decide for myself.
She helped me look into my past, learn things about myself I couldn't see on my own, and showed me how they directly affect my emotions today.
My cold feet, it turned out, were due to feelings about my family, how I viewed myself, and how I let people treat me -- not my fiance.
Yes, it's been a lot of effort, time, and money to get to this place. There's no doubt about that!
Today, on a daily basis, I feel excited when I think about my wedding
So many moments I can't help but just beam."